I just wanted to listen to WTF podcasts and the new Jeezy song with Andre 3000 and smoke cigarettes in my basement but I’d had a headache every day for half a week and Barry wanted me to write 200 words about vagina saints and he said he’d already asked Amelia and Mary and xTx and even though he didn’t want to lick any of our vaginas except Mary’s, I couldn’t say no, even though I wasn’t religious and didn’t know shit about saints and didn’t feel inspired. I got online and went to alt lit gossip even though every time I go there I fantasize about crashing an AWP offsite party and shooting up some hipster’s apartment like it’s a high school and there were the usual updates about Tao and --- and chicks who try to write like Tao and --- and other people I don’t give a shit about but feel compelled to look at anyway and I still didn’t feel inspired. My daughter came in the room and asked me what I was doing and I told her I had to write 200 words about vagina saints and she said, that’s stupid, and I said, I know, and still I had a headache.