I was trying to keep the deer out of my horse garden. They kept getting in and eating the horses. The horses wouldn't even get that big just foals before deer would come in and nibble their manes. Then my wife said I should just keep at it, that that was the price of growing things organically. I told her she doesn't understand and then I realized that she is a hotel, that I've been married to a hotel this whole damn time and I formed a plan. Late at night, when she was asleep, I took a pouch of horse seeds and a few bags of mulch and snuck into her front door. She has a giant picture window that faces out of living room in her honeymoon suite, so right there I made a little bed. I threw her curtains wide open and dumped soil down on her carpet and began to plant. I've been doing this every night for weeks now, coming in and tending the horses I am growing inside my wife. I don't think she's figured it out yet, but the horses have been coming along nicely. What a wonderful lady, my wife.